LoVe?

Yes I am a very very extremely flirtaciouse girl.... But I dont know what love is... This week I have been thinking alot about it because of some struggles a very close friend I have is dealing with. I care so much about him that it is very very unreal. But sometimes you just have to sit back and let things happen....
(if you dont know what im talking about, then dont worry about it, this is only directed to one person.... tks)
We have been through some very hard times alex. And ya i am pretty much bipolar when it comes to relationships. *sorry about that :D* We started off not wanting to have anything other than a friendship. Then it progressed into something much more than that. It exploded into a pretty seriouse thing. Then both of us made some pretty stupid decisions that ended that... I just wanted to be friends again, and it didnt work. I pretty much feel like a failure at the friendship we did have....
just know i will always care.
<3

~

This week has been a very... thoughtful week for me. There were alot of experiences that I have been faced with, that has made me think about myself, and my life. A very Special girl passed away this week, from an awful car accident. She was the most outgoing, most vivaciouse girl you could ever meet. Her funeral was yesterday. And going there made me realize that a whole entire school can come together to celebrate the life of the most incredible girl ever. It helped me to understand the plan of salvation alot more. And I am so greatful that I have been able to experience this feeling. Lindsays spirit will always be with us. And I just wanted everyone to know that I have learned a huge lesson from her life.
I remember one time me, my best friend Camille, Lindsay and her older sister were up in Salt Lake doing a fundraiser... And the WHOLE entire time we were saying that we had to get dipndots when we were done... so as soon as the shift was over we were all running over to get some when they closed it!!! rude i know.... but lindsay.... she wanted some so bad, that she ended up talking the people into opening it back up just for us to get dipndots!!! i was sooo impressed!!!!
Alot of other things have happend this week. Our band won western regionals (woot woot!) and I am so proud of how far the colorguard has come... my appreciation towards tiff daryl and kass could not be expressed in words!!!! gah. they are just amazing!!!!

Dear Diary: mood apathetic!

hahaha

So this is the guard that I am on :D There is appoximately uhhhh... 46 of us now. We have had alot of girls quit because of the recent changes, but we have also gained quite a few more also!

Our show this year is called "island" and let me tell you. it is probably the funnest show ever! Our uniforms are pretty much the bomb.com even tho they are fetching cold. But anyways back to my story. These girls are my bestest friends ever! We are pretty much like sistas! hahaha we play just like sistas but we also fight just like sistas. but hey thats okay. That is what makes us such good friends in the first place. I just wanted to thank these girls and my two moms (tiff and daryl) for always being there for me and being the bestestest friends ever! i could never repay them. love you all!